Cardboard cop credited with collar; Recruit too smart for academy class
PoliceOne today begins a new regular feature — the National Law Enforcement News Roundup — which summarizes some of the police-related headlines getting attention across the country. Check out today’s selection and let us know what you think.
Life-size Cardboard Cutout of Ohio Officer Makes Arrest
As he was being placed in the backseat of a Worthington PD patrol car, the suspect, 25-year-old Bruce Crowder, exclaimed, “You should have seen the look that cop gave me — I was scared!” Worthington Police Chief Bud Abbott said, “Crowder is going to have a hard time in jail living this arrest down.” Abbott added, “Shoplifting is down 65 percent with the help of the cardboard Cops.”
Shop owner Vanetta Murphree commented, “Most shoplifters just leave the store when they see the full size reproduction cop.”
Adopt-A-Felon Program Replaces DARE
School board superintendant Harold Morgan said, “The children get to see their adopted felon’s human side and in some cases even become ‘pen-pals’ with their felons, meeting them after school just to see how they’re doing.”
Many of these three-time losers live in nearby halfway houses and some have court-mandated ankle monitors. Morgan said that each year, students get a different felon for his or her respective grade level, thus allowing the students to get acquainted with several different felons throughout their elementary school education. At a recent press conference, State District Judge Carl Young said, “The partnership between convicted felons and elementary school children shows young people that felons are people too and as one third-grader put it, they probably had bad mommies and daddies who didn’t give them nice presents at Christmas or ice cream with their cake at birthday parties.”
Police Applicant’s IQ Too High for the Job
Lt. Jim Gamble, who sits on the board, said the police policy might be unwise but is a rational way to reduce employee turnover. “The department’s theory is that Mr. Griswald would get bored with police work and leave soon after undergoing intensive and costly police training,” Gamble said.
Griswald, who is 29 years old, has a photographic memory and still holds the State High School wrestling record for most pins. He currently works at City-Wide Pawn and moonlights part time at the Yellow Cab Company. He said he always wanted to be a Fargo cop but will now have to consider taking a job as a tower sniper presently being offered by the Dept. of Corrections.
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